The day Muni took the black pill

Think Muni and the mind conjures many things. A clever logo. The 8:35 express that wasn't there. Nate Jones and his ilk. For me, it's a fairly dependable conveyance to work. It is also frequently nausea-inducing, either because of its lingering scent of urine, or for the lurching driving style of its operators. But I admittedly have a delicate constitution.

The 14 Mission almost took off our car's passenger side mirror once. Emboldened by their hulking shells of metal, Muni operators think nothing of crowding you out on the City's narrow streets.

But common grievances aside, the most unheard of thing happened on my commute not too long ago. The 1 California AX Express ran out of gas. And it didn't come to a fizzling halt just anywhere- the bus decided to quit in front of the driveway of the King-American Ambulance Company on Bush Street. Now we were in a pickle.

Traffic on Bush Street is hectic to say the least. It can be like a three lane freeway, with its timed lights and aggressive commuters hurtling towards downtown. The bus driver wouldn't let us out at first for safety reasons, and then one by one the EMTs started coming out of the ambulance company, scratching their heads in awe.

EMT: "Uh, you're going to have to move that bus. We're a 911 responding ambulance center."

Muni Operator: "Well, I can't. I'm out of gas. I've called for help, but it might take a while."

Those of us on board all wondered how a City bus can run out of gas? Don't they check these things? Apparently not. Our driver, who I must state is one of the nicest guys out there, simply said, "Call Muni" when confronted with our questions.

We sat for a while, uneasy as we waited for the fateful wail of sirens that would alert us to the fact a trapped ambulance would be unable to respond to a life-or-death emergency. Thankfully that never happened. The EMTs had started gathering with the plan to push the bus and all of us in it, but then someone managed to open up a secondary driveway.

Eventually the driver let us off and we stood around waiting for a new bus to pick us up, laughing easily in the new found camaraderie the morning had given us. Once we were finally headed downtown, we passed yet another Muni bus being towed. It was like a Muni bus suicide pact. It made for the most interesting commute I've had in a while.

Waiting for a ride on Bush Street (disabled bus in background)